When u know it all

Why do it when u know i hate it most?? & to do it knowing means u'r prepared for the outcome?? then why be sorry about it?? the betrayal of trust had made my heart broken/shattered & feeling sad & out.. we promised each other to be frank with either party but what happened to that promise?? that's not the worst.. the worst is i found out the fact myself from another person's mouth.. why?? even though it did not take place but the intention to lie/hide things from me is there already.. i know i shouldn't blame u for all but the truth had been uncovered myself.. why hint me when u already know the intention?? i'm so disappointed & sorry for myself for being so naive.. i have given u my soul & heart but what did i get in return?? i never ask for any returns from u but why gave me such a deep wound to bear?? its not your fault since u did it not letting me worried & made me wander in my thoughts.. where did all my effort goes?? all forgotten & thrown aside/away??