guess i'm old already.. i actually missed my station.. with only one stop away from my destination.. ended up at dover mrt & gotta rush to work by cab.. damn.. tomorrow must try to wake up earlier lor.. if not kana black mark ar..
i guess i don't hate myself but despise myself more.. i should have stood firmly just like what i did for the past 7years.. where has my determination gone to? or is it that i open up myself too much that i have weaken slowly over the years? shame on yourself.. just say u'r afraid of loneliness.. u need a partner by your side.. i really don't want to think about it anymore.. i'm so afraid of r/s.. i'm afraid of losing that someone i like.. i'm afraid of everything.. she got her direction to work towards to while i'm stuck at finding a job only.. why am i losing out to so many people.. i hate it.. if i had completed my diploma the other time.. i won't feel this way at all.. why must there be problem the other time that forces me to stop.. why all this!! i hate myself.. i don't blame anyone but i blame myself for it.. i want to give myself up.. drive myself crazy better & i can stay in "hougang charlet" all my life & not think of anything anymore.. life will be so much better like this.. being human is so difficult.. i won't end my life by suicide.. i don't even bother want to hurt myself.. die a slow & wonderful death is good.. how i wish for that..
but what i really wished for is to hold her hands & hug her tightly.. cherishing the every moments we spent together.. telling her how much i like her.. talking about the goals we going to achieve.. want to be with her for the good & bad times.. always there for her.. but i know all this is beyond my reach.. never near at all.. i felt i'm drifting further & further..
Welcome~~
My Tarot Card
You are The Devil
Materiality. Material Force. Material temptation; sometimes obsession
The Devil is often a great card for business success; hard work and ambition.
Perhaps the most misunderstood of all the major arcana, the Devil is not really "Satan" at all, but Pan the half-goat nature god and/or Dionysius. These are gods of pleasure and abandon, of wild behavior and unbridled desires. This is a card about ambitions; it is also synonymous with temptation and addiction. On the flip side, however, the card can be a warning to someone who is too restrained, someone who never allows themselves to get passionate or messy or wild - or ambitious. This, too, is a form of enslavement. As a person, the Devil can stand for a man of money or erotic power, aggressive, controlling, or just persuasive. This is not to say a bad man, but certainly a powerful man who is hard to resist. The important thing is to remember that any chain is freely worn. In most cases, you are enslaved only because you allow it.
What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.
My Horoscope
 |  |
1 comment:
hey, why think that way? may be tat is a process to train you, a step of growing up ba. Holding a degree doesn't mean that you have the standard of degree, holding a diploma doesn't mean that u only have the standard of diploma. u may have more than that.
Think positively ok, believe in yourself that u can do it then u can.
Post a Comment